Want to be more — not for him - For Myself!
Okay.. This was from a while ago… Guess I have the guts to post it now… It’s just makin urself so vulnerable kinda sucks… But not Many ppl read it - soo it’s kinda my way out :)Tears Fill My Eye…. It’s Been A While.. Since We Talked… Today you Invited Me Over.. But I’m At a Loss.. I Didn’t Go… I Didn’t Bother… I refused to be Used - For Your Own intentions… Sorry, Did I fail to mention?? You don’t have a hold on me anymore!!
I’d be lying if i said it didn’t hurt.. I know that you alone could shatter my heart in pieces - again… I don’t want to be with you - let alone.. go back.. Because in my life right now - there is so much you lack… And the funny thing is you don’t want me either…
You just want my touch.. to fill you for the moment… Which has me wondering, since I know you have others.. So, why bother?? I’m not a cheap lay - I’m not letting you get a hold of me.. With a touch of your finger tips.. your lips… I’m sure that’s enough temptation…
But… can you see my frustration?!? I’ve been alone since you left… Untouched.. And yet you just can’t seem to get enough!?! So, why should I say yes… For one time with you again.. May leave me with tears for hours… As the next girl roles in…
So is it fair to me - that you’ll get all the pleasure? and I get to go home used and teathered… I know I told you no, I never even bothered… Didn’t even go over… But either way, it’s just the same.. You just want me for ecstasy… And pleasure…
And I stay home… all alone…
I feel lonely, I feel crushed, Wanting to be more than just an ex for satisfaction… I want to feel wanted - not just for some sex because I’m your ex… I don’t want to feel like that’s all I’m good for… I want More!!!!
So, I stay to myself… And find my way out… But today it hit me harder than usual….
2 years ago